So I had a really nice Thanksgiving this year. Some extended family came into town and we all went out to a restaurant. I enjoyed myself, but gradually I began to feel like something was off. Really off. At first I couldn’t really tell why I was feeling so stifled, anxious and irritable. But now, after a day or so to reflect and re-center, I get it.
Opening to a spiritual path changes everything about you. It changes you at a core fundamental level. Your very vibration changes as you open to receive more and more light into yourself. As you begin to accept that you are more than just a physical being, as you create that clear channel between yourself, your Guides, Angels and Deceased Loved Ones, everything about you shifts and rearranges. Old habits, activities and people that you once enjoyed fall away. Your priorities change, your tastes change – your personality and character change. As you open to Spirit you release the old habits and hurts and you make room for love, compassion and forgiveness. You open a channel to the Divine and you begin to see your life as part of an eternal flow. Everything about you shifts in a deep, powerful and beautiful way.
When you are with family and old friends, you are with people who know you a certain way. You have a long and established history and dynamic with these individuals and they understand you and see you in a particular light. Their perception of you exists in a framework that has been created over a long period of time. They feel that they know you, understand you, maybe even predict you. Most importantly, they know who they are in relation to who you are.
Now, even if you aren’t trumpeting your Spirituality about to everyone, or yelling from the rooftops or anything like that, others still feel the shift when you change your belief system. These changes are felt even when you aren’t making a point of discussing your beliefs. Changes on this level are like the rumblings in the Earth as the plates begin to shift – it is deep and silent but the ground itself is moving and other can feel it too, even if they don’t know what it is they are feeling. When people sense change occurring in those they have come to see and understand in a certain way, it can be unsettling. They may question who you are now, and if you are different, where does that leave them? Your changes may shake their own foundations and make them feel uncomfortable on a conscious or unconscious level. They may feel a mix of confusion, rejection or fear that their status quo is suddenly in question.
So you are changing – you feel it and your family feels it, even if they aren’t saying it out loud. Now, because you are opening your awareness to energy and to Spirit, you sense your family’s unease. You can energetically feel other’s feelings towards you – their confusion, their rejection, and the walls they are putting up. The doubt, fear and anxiety you may be feeling in these situations are not always coming from you – you most likely are picking up on other’s emotions. Your family loves you and they are not (usually) intentionally trying to block you out, but to an empathic person it can feel that way. The important thing to remember is that this reaction is not personal – it is a form of self-defense for people who are afraid of the changes they sense in you because it implies change that they too may need to make. Change is scary for many people and they will do almost anything to avoid it.
In these situations when you sense yourself getting anxious, irritable or feeling like there is a big thick wall around you and you don’t quite know why, here’s what you do:
- Separate your energy. The fast and easy way to do this is to imagine yourself in a golden egg. Your egg can be as large or small as you want – as long as it completely surrounds you. Inside the egg is you and outside is everyone and everything else. Then, imagine a white force field around your egg that pushes away the energy that is pressing in on you.
- Detach. When you feel overwhelmed, separate. Take yourself to a different room and take some time to release your emotions. Try to look at the whole scenario you are in as an outsider – like someone looking in through a window. This helps to pull yourself out of the emotions you feel and back into a higher perspective. Try to do this without judgment – just as an innocent bystander would pass by a window and see a group of people inside together. This helps to clarify the roles being played and can take the heat out of the situation for you.
- Clear. Take extra time to clear your energy. Ask Archangel Michael to clear any negative energies from within and around you. Take time to breathe white light in and circulate it in each energy center.
As you find yourself in the company of people you love but may not have much in common with, remember that you have nothing to prove and nothing to hide. You are who you are just as they are who they are. Your family is your soul group and there are important reasons you are together – perhaps one of them for you can be to learn how to be true yourself and stand your ground, in your own heart.